Kiss me

Just got back from Mid Valley, today was fairly productive. Ashley, Young Jin, Hiroki and I managed to put the balls and sticks together for our Chem diamond model, still got a long procress of balancing and painting it but hell, not today, I've had enough. Came across Bershka today for the first time after hearing all about it from Kim, holy hell, I tried on the whole store. They have incredible stuffs, thus everything is awfully cheap compared to its quality and design. Grabbed a pair of jeans and a pencil skirt. 
Last night I took Jon for a walk, it was like any usual walk, except the whole time I just sat on the swing, and swung my way off the earth. The calming sense took over my body, though it was tangled with traces of loneliness, in the silence of the night. 
I wonder what it feels like to be skinny, and thin, and wake up in the morning in nothing but a t-shirt, undies, messy hair, that 'just woke up look' and still have someone think I'm hot, to have guys look at me, to have guys want to be my boyfriend, to have girls be jealous of my body, to feel my hipbones and collarbones, to feel confident in a bikini, to sit down and not feel fat everywhere, to not rub out the thighs in my jeans, to need a smaller size in the store, I wonder what its like to look in the mirror and like what I see, and not want to break the mirror. Pretty much, I just want to be beautiful. I could go on forever..