For real?

I cried so much last night it was crazy. I don't know where the tears came from, it was that split moment when I stared out the lonely darkness on the street, and the song came up from my speaker..

Cause I’m for real
Are you for real?
I can’t help myself
It’s the way I feel
When you look me in the eyes like you did last night
I can’t stand to hear you say goodbye
But it feels so right ‘cause it feels so right just to have you standing by my side
So don’t let me go cause you have my soul
And I just wanted you to know
I don’t wanna look back cause I know that we have
Something the past could never change.
And I’m stuck in the moment
And my heart is open
Tell me that you feel the same

the song which was on repeat a thousand times the past couple of weeks, always gets me everytime...
I went thru all the diaries and notes since 3 years ago, everything.. It hurts but I couldn't stop myself.. I craved for a little of familiarity cause I felt so alone, I felt so rejected, and hurt..
I miss Hanoi so much, it's drilling a hole thru me to come back here..